Every post on this blog begins with "I haven't seen you in a while." That's a bit embarrassing. That being said, I haven't seen you in a while! Let's catch up.
This is going to be a very thorough post detailing what I've been doing all this time. At the end, I'll lay out some plans and explain where I'm at now, so if you're only interested in what's coming up, just scrolllll down. Feel free to skip around to what interests you, otherwise you'll be here a while.
The past two years or so have been a very tumultuous time for me. My life has undergone rapid change, and continues to accelerate. But now, I am seeing a destination where previously I was hurtling into an unknown void, hoping things would turn out okay. I owe it to those who follow me to tell them a bit about what I've been up to before the start of something new.
Horror Projects
June 2015 - December 2015: ZeroImpurity
(Skip this paragraph if you don't care about backstory). One of my inspirations is the YouTube horror web series Marble Hornets (the link takes you to a playlist of the series in released order). It started in 2009, at the very beginning of the Slenderman craze. The series lasted five years and 87+ episodes, gaining 89,000,000 total video views, spawning offshoot web series, and marking the beginning of a trend of freely available free-form multimedia storytelling on the internet. The production crew behind Marble Hornets, Troy Has a Camera LLC (or THAC), was a group of friends that showed me what a grassroots community created through hard work can look like. They had a comedy channel on the side, and a bustling forum with passionate and dedicated members. It was the first fan base I was really a huge part of, becoming one of the most influential and active members.
A member of the THAC forum wanted to make a web series with other forum members. Around 15 people joined the project, all with an equal creative stake. As one of the oldest contributors, my goal in the group was to guide the project in an original direction and do administrative and organizational work like arranging story writing meetings and creating the YouTube channel.
After several months of writing and ironing out story details (in which our group dropped to 10 members), the channel was created on September 19th, 2015. The story was convoluted due to the compromises we had to make to represent everybody's ideas, but it was promising and unique, following seven story lines in an anthology style before they converged at one point. We had a strong start over the next several months, releasing 10 episodes and gaining more attention than most similar projects due at their inception. At that point, though, the project stalled as we waited for the next episode to upload.
Our mistake was the management of the project, or lack thereof. Because everyone had an equal creative stake, the project lacked a clear vision or leadership. Competing philosophies on presentation that would have made the project awesome either way ended up blending together to make a muddled combined product that was lesser than the multiple separate paths available. No clear leaders were designated, so when a few members began grappling for power, tensions grew high and morale lessened. Eventually, one member (who did a large load of the work and handled the presentation of videos on the channel, which was a mistake due to the creative power this gave them) left, and the project was abandoned with all members still retaining control over the YouTube channel.
Recently, that member used the opportunity to begin "shitposting" on the channel. This escalated until the original series' videos were deleted, leaving no evidence of the work I and nine others created. At the moment, there are no copies of the series left. Otherwise, I would provide a link to show what the project looked like. The channel has been recovered and swiped clean, so if the videos are found again they will be re-uploaded for anyone who is curious.
This was a bitter end to a project I valued dearly, but in the end I am satisfied with the outcomes. While our concept was strong, the execution of it was iffy and if the series had continued, I don't think it would have been at a quality level I would be happy with. I did not formally announce it on any communication streams I had set up because I wanted to make sure it worked out before people knew about it. I am happy about that decision. There are some other planned projects I will approach this way, because I want to test them on their individual merit before bringing a larger audience into them.
November 2015 - February 2016: The Seven Trials of HABIT
(More backstory, skip this paragraph if you'd like). One of the offshoots inspired by Marble Hornets is Everyman HYBRID (EMH), a much longer and more convoluted series. If you wish to get into it, I recommend watching this series of explanation videos by an excellent web horror analysis YouTube channel called Night Mind (check him out too, he finds so many awesome things). EMH is more like an Alternate Reality Game (ARG) than Marble Hornets was. ARGs are extremely popular in the online horror community. They are stories in which viewers, or players, can take part and influence outcomes. EMH's most ARG-like element was a tournament called The Seven Trials of HABIT, run by a demon character named HABIT [sic]. Players had to complete seven tasks and record themselves doing it to win the favor of HABIT and receive packages that advanced the story of EMH.
I took part in two fan-made tributes to the original Seven Trials due to peer pressure from the THAC community. One was in the summer of 2015, in which I entered as a masked character with much higher production value than any of the other contestants. The game masters, or GMs, asked me to participate behind the scenes to advance the storyline.
The first game ended before the story line finished. Some of the people who were behind the scenes of that tournament wished to reboot and finish the story, so they began another one on Halloween 2015. This time, I was involved behind the scenes from the beginning, and much more involved in the story, which was also more developed than the last tournament. A significant amount of time and effort was spent on these videos and the regular meetings and story events of the tournament.
I learned much from this experience, which ran almost parallel with ZeroImpurity. Watching and talking with the GMs, I saw firsthand what an involved online series looks like. I befriended some creators from an online collective of horror stories called the Arkn Mythos. As I talked, I began to develop ideas for a project. As of yet, I will not reveal any details and I will not guarantee that it will be made. Over time, I have become very careful about announcing things. Anything I muse about creating is not definitely happening until I've learned to stick to my schedules a bit better.
This period of time when I was firsthand deeply involved with online horror communities piqued my interest in horror and online storytelling of a darker variety. Expect a stronger horror influence in upcoming projects.
Comedy Projects
The Epic Teatime
The flagship of my creative projects has been fairly dead for a little over a year. This pains me, but it is something I must face. I see the snag at my talk series, Tea Chats, hitting a lull after Episode 2, when I gained 6,000 views and a 50/50 like/dislike ratio. This scared me. It took six months of inactivity for the next episode to come out, and production on the next three was smooth. Then, at Episode 5, I hit another block, this time creative. I didn't know where I wanted to take the series, and I didn't have any ideas for what I wanted to make.
In the period of time afterward, I made two comedy shorts.
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This marks the death of the current incarnation of the channel - more on that and the future of Tea Chats below. I have other things to talk about.
the mediocre teatime
Previously named The Epic Vlogtime, this channel has been re-purposed into an outlet for my free creative expression on YouTube. This is where videos that don't match the planning or quality level of The Epic Teatime hang out. Doesn't mean they're bad, just that they're more eclectic. At the moment, I'm doing a "Reaction-On-Reaction" series. Check it out below.
Unnamed Group Project
This is where things get exciting. My friends since high school have all had very similar ideas about art and we all enjoy making videos. Over the summer, we agreed to form a YouTube comedy troupe. Expect avant-garde/alt comedy sketches coming soon. We have filmed one episode of an improv series and are in the conceptual stages of another sketch-based series. Our common influences include the Bob Odenkirk/Tim & Eric crew and Adult Swim comedy titans like the Eric Andre Show. The channel hasn't been created yet, and we don't even have a name.
Personally, I am very excited about this project due to what I've been interested in over the past couple years. THAC was a similar buddy-comedy-troupe. They split up in April, and I was strangely affected by it because of the level of involvement I had in the community. I feel like I will, in part, be filling a void that I personally feel after the split, as well as the same void for many others who were left behind in the community. I've learned how awesome community is recently, and I hope this project will garner one.
The fate of The Epic Teatime is uncertain due to this upcoming commitment. I see myself continuing Tea Chats on The Epic Teatime, but members of the unnamed troupe wish to absorb Tea Chats and content for The Epic Teatime into the troupe. I wish to keep it separate. Effort on sketch videos will also be fully diverted toward the comedy troupe, so that form of content looks like it will be scarce on The Epic Teatime. Perhaps short films will be more likely fare for The Epic Teatime. Time will tell as I figure it out.
Music
It's taken me so long to get here, but this is the part I wrote this blog post to communicate. Thanks for sticking it out with me, now shake yourself out of your bored stupor and pay attention.
I've been alluding to a "death" of things. I feel like all of my creative endeavors ground to a halt around summer, which was an incredibly frustrating time for me. My current state as an artist is mirrored in my music.
"This will most likely be the last you hear of Squdlum for a while. I'm going to keep making music, of course... but I'm going to do it for the purpose of improving my musical abilities. Meaning it will suck, and you won't hear it."
Blog post from January 15, 2015
It's almost been two years since I said that in a release post for a remix of an original song, and true to form, I haven't uploaded anything to my SoundCloud. I made one track after that release. It sucked, and I didn't upload it. At that point, my art began dying.
I didn't derive fun out of it. I did it in an endless pursuit of excellence, but, never achieving that excellence, gave up most of the time. Happiness and inspiration hit an all-time low. This was reflected in everything I did. Tea Chats died, then renewed, then died again. Activity ceased on everything. I started an account on clyp.it and uploaded snippets, but the output was slow and I never finished anything.
What I needed was a change in perspective.
The past couple months have been amazing for me. I'll go into more detail in the "School" section below, but suffice to say I'm back on track and evolving my sound. I've vastly expanded my knowledge of music in general by listening to as many genres as possible, and it's influenced my style profoundly. I'm actually happy with what I'm making and working on an unofficial mix tape-type release that will acquaint everyone with who I've become as an artist and hopefully start getting my name out there. More plans for everything (not just music) are down below. WE'RE ALMOST DONE I PROMISE.
School
In the spring semester, I finished my General Education courses, allowing me to focus all of my effort this semester on my Cinema & Television Arts major. This is where most of my time and effort has gone since late August.
First things first though - I had one GE left for this semester: Life, or some other stupid name like that. It's supposed to be a course that prepares you for life somehow. I took a leadership course, since I figured if I want to be a director of film I ought to be a good leader as well. The course has been phenomenal, opening my eyes to so many things. It has a focus on personal leadership; the philosophy is that if I can't lead myself I can't lead others. Of course, such a phenomenal change in personal leadership is difficult to achieve in a semester, but the course has given me the foundation and tools to realize what needs to be done if I want to get where I want to go. It's helped me straighten out who I am and what I wish to do.
Another course I'm taking (for my major this time) is a beginning production course. I'm doing very well in it, and I feel like my success and experience is a long-needed confirmation that I've chosen the right path. For so long, I've had to accept the fact that I don't know how I will do in a film career, and that I've gambled my life and education on something that might not work. Now, I feel like I have a natural talent for it and I don't feel so up-in-the-air about it. I'm very chill, so I was okay with not knowing how things were going to work, but I still feel like some weight has been lifted. Here are two projects I've completed for the class, with a third being uploaded soon:
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You can see that horror influence I mentioned earlier in the second video, and you will see it in the third video as well.
The screenwriting courses for my major are intended to help students develop a screenplay from conception to rewriting. I'm at the conception stage, and the story I'm writing is something personal to me that has received positive feedback from both the instructor and peers. This is a minor side note, just showing that there are so many projects under the hood I don't talk about but are still in long-term development.
The Future
All of this brings us to this last section. The past semester, I feel the beginning of a rebirth of me as an artist. These classes are forcing me into a new level of professionalism, and I feel it in everything I make. My music is tighter and more presentable. My videos, though scarce, have production quality multiple times higher than anything I've made before. As I rapidly approach graduation, the reality that soon I will have to throw myself into my art in order to make it is dawning on me. My paradigm is rapidly shifting, and so will everything I make.
I am no longer somebody doing this for fun, or to pass the time. I am becoming someone who will make a living off of this, who will think deeply about who they affect and how. I wish to be an inspiration to a few now, if not many.
In terms of music: I've already mentioned that I'm making a mixtape. As stated before, this will help me get my name out there. If I get signed by a label, bonus points! (even then, I'm still not sure whether I'd rather stay independent). The plan after that? An EP of tracks I hope will come to be known as "Squdlum dance classics." Then, a full-length concept album that will expand everyone's understanding of what I do in music. This could take years. I don't know. It could change. You can follow me on SoundCloud for updates. I'm trying to move more onto YouTube as a platform, though, so it would be smarter to follow me there. The YouTube channel is sparse right now, but I have ideas.
What can you expect from The Epic Teatime? (click the name to go to the YouTube channel, don't forget to subscribe)
I'm redeveloping Tea Chats. The series will stay mostly the same at its core, but I will also be pushing it in a higher quality, higher production value direction with stronger comedy elements. It's still very much in development as I figure out what the best format is and how to gain the most audience retention and engagement. There will be no schedule for now, but once I find my footing in how I want it to be presented, I can begin working on flow and routine. The goal is to have the show released regularly and a staple of my channel.
I am also in the process of writing a personal video talking about the changes in my life as I enter full-on adulthood. I don't normally go personal on my channel, but I find it very nice, refreshing, and genuine when someone drops the act and production value to have a heart-to-heart every once in a while. I hope to communicate the things I've learned and present the video in such a way that viewers benefit rather than just hearing me unload.
I will make an announcement on The Epic Teatime (and here) once the group comedy troupe goes live online; be sure to subscribe when that happens because most of my activity will be redirected to there as we establish ourselves.
I also need to update everything. Art for all of my social media is super outdated, so I might do a photo shoot at some point so people can see I'm not a silly high school kid anymore. I'm a silly college boy now! This site needs an upgrade, and I'm considering moving off the Weebly platform so I can have more freedom in what I do. This includes games; I haven't mentioned it in this blog post but I am still a hobbyist programmer and have been learning Python recently. I'll work on games when I have the time, and I hope to release some, at some point.
I... I think that's it. Phew. That was a doozy. I've been writing for a while. It needed to be done; I need to communicate with those who follow me. If you've lasted this long, thank you so much. Thank you so much for following me, and supporting me, and staying interested in me. I'm at the cusp of the start of a new era, and you were here from the beginning.